Wednesday, September 21, 2011

trying harder

some of you know that in mid August I went on a retreat through my church - Christ Renews His Parish (CRHP).  I wasn't sure what to expect when  I went but I am SO glad I did.  Its not one of those fancy retreats that some churches put on, this is a really focused retreat with limited luxuries.  At first I was quite nervous about not having certain things but I understand why it had to be that way. 

Its put me back on track to who really is #1 in not just my life but the children's as well!  I have joined formation for the next retreat with a GREAT group of ladies who I call my Sisters in Christ.

While all this is great, I still question certain things.  I don't feel like I know how to pray.  I mean, yes I pray but am I doing it to the fullest extent I can?  Does that make sense?  Some people can pray and its SO beautiful and when I hear myself I feel like I struggle with it. 

Do I really have to change everything about me to believe in God?  Do I change my music to only Christian music, the shows we watch on tv, everything? 

I know my journey towards Him is going to be a long one.  I am really just trying to figure out how to get there!

Any advise or anything could help!


  1. I wish I had some answers for you, but I have the exact same questions! I found myself nonchalantly talking to God about Grace this morning and stopped and thought, "Should it be more formal than this?" I listen to Christian music because I like it, but I don't shy away from "regular" music either. I watch some pretty 'bad' shows and don't see myself changing that. Just wanted to let you know you aren't alone with your questions!

  2. no, you definitely are not alone. I struggle with the same questions myself. I pray quietly and things pretty eloquent in my head, but when I pray out loud, it becomes jumbled... but I don't try to worry about it much. There was a message from church a few years back... praying is like communicating and conversing to God. It can be an text message "Thank you, God, for this rain!" or a quick email or a more in depth conversation. Praise and requests. God hears simple prayers without the "thou's" and "almighty" and other verbose ways to pray.